廢墟 Birth Among The Ruins

舊金山連綿的傾盆大雨, 遠距離的我竟也頗為煩心, 大雨令避無可避的螞蟻們成群結隊往屋內逃, LK的租客(ㄧ對溫文有禮但仔細的近乎瑣碎的老夫婦)抱怨不已, 更甚者, 暴雨讓天臺某處的出水口塞滿落葉, 隨牆穿透, 災延本人兩間自用的地下儲藏室… 才不過兩個月前, 我如海貍鼠梳理搬運, 分類裝箱… 看著房屋經紀傳來的水患照片, 多年小心翼翼的收藏竟在和我離別沒多久便毀損頹敗, 心頭陣陣淒涼… 轉念想想, 天地, 萬物之逆旅, 光陰, 百代之過客, 浮生若夢, 為歡幾何? 身外長物, 我不過是代為保管的博物館員罷了.

瀏覽數位檔案夾, 還是忍不住輕嘆...
粉撲與懷錶式香膏盒, 我純粹收藏, ㄧ次也沒用過. 拿出來把玩時總想起如Marie Antoinette般的風流女子, 現下浸了水, 聯想的會否是變裝的Elton John?!


對種種花鳥蟲獸等等Nature's Curiosities古繪本興趣濃厚, 多年前在文具坊見獵心喜, 購入ㄧ套珊瑚卡片, 這當口面目全非嗎?

在NYC買的多用白瓷小牌, 應該survive the flood?

雖是Shaker's Box, 卻購自東京的設計店, 木片碰水自然兇多吉少… 唉

只好頻頻對小V大唱life is but a dream, 母子兩人分食ㄧ塊乳酪蛋糕解憂.

分享ㄧ首我很喜歡的波蘭詩人Wislawa Szymborska的Nothing's A Gift:

Nothing's a gift, it's all on loan.
I'm drowning in debts up to my ears.
I'll have to pay for myself
with my self,
give up my life for my life.

Here's how it's arranged:
The heart can be repossessed,
the liver, too,
and each single finger and toe.

Too late to tear up the terms,
my debts will be repaid,
and I'll be fleeced,
or, more precisely, flayed.

I move about the planet
in a crush of other debtors.
some are saddled with the burden
of paying off their wings.
Others must, willy-nilly,
account for every leaf.

Every tissue in us lies
on the debit side.
Not a tenacle or tendril
is for keeps.

The inventory, infinitely detailed,
implies we'll be left
not just empty-handed
but handless too.

I can't remember
where, when, and why
I let someone open
this account in my name.

We call the protest against this
the soul.
And it's the only item
not included on the list.

Translated by Stanislaw Baranczak and Clare Cavanagh